Posts Tagged ‘Pastoral Care’

Central Texas Conference Prays for Fort Hood

Saturday, November 7th, 2009

United Methodist Bishop Mike Lowery has asked the 320 churches of the Central Texas Conference to join in this prayer for Fort Hood this Sunday:

Lord God, we come to you in grief and shock over the shootings at Fort Hood. We pray this day for the families who have lost loved ones, for those who are wounded and for all who suffer from this horrible violence. Pour your grace-filled love and comfort over them that they may be strengthened by your presence and upheld by your love. Receive, O Lord, our prayers of gratitude for all those who courageously responded to stop the violence and for all who have labored in treating those harmed. Enfold Fort Hood and the entire area in your care. Bless and guide this nation and all who serve. In your goodness and by your mercy Lord God, may we be instruments of healing and hope. In the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit we pray. Amen.

Central Texas Methodists issued this statement on its website:

The loss of lives and injuries at Fort Hood is a tragic situation that is touching the lives of many people. Our thoughts and prayers are with the loved ones who are struggling with this loss and to those who have been injured.

We have five United Methodist churches in the immediate Killeen area that are opening their hearts and doors to these families and all military personnel and others in the community who seek solace and love. Many of the military personnel and their families are members of the congregations at First, St. Andrews and St. Luke churches, all in Killeen, Grace in Copperas Cove and Harker Heights. District Superintendent Rankin Koch has been in touch with the pastors at each of the churches, and the conference Disaster Response Team is standing by to offer assistance and spiritual care if needed.

Rev. Dr. E.F. “Skip” Blancett, senior pastor at First UMC, Killeen, is all too familiar with battle scenes and grief as a former military chaplain deployed during Desert Storm and later serving at Fort Hood. “This community is grieving,” he said. Anyone connected with or living in the vicinity of a military base like Fort Hood becomes part of the family, he added, and “an attack on any member of the family is an attack on all of us. We are all grieving.”

Like other churches in the area, First Killeen opened its prayer chapel the afternoon of the shootings and again today. “Prayer is important at times this,” Blancett said. “But just as important is the people’s need to share their pain and grief with others.” The congregation is assembling “care baskets” for the families of the victims with notes saying “Someone at First United Methodist Church cares for you,” and reaching out to the working press with trays of snack foods. As for long-term care and spiritual needs, Blancett said, “I don’t know how much will be needed yet, but I call tell you from past experience there will be a need.”

Receive the Report

Wednesday, April 15th, 2009

Very early every morning, the company to which I am assigned forms up before physical training begins. When the platoon sergeants see the first sergeant walk to the front of the formation, they each call, "Platoon ...," the preliminary command causing everyone casually standing at ease to snap to parade rest, eyes to the front. "Atten..shun. Parade rest." We come to attention as a unit, and then as a unit we return to parade rest.

The first sergeant takes his place beside the company guidon and calls, "Fall in." Now, the entire company comes to attention as one. "Receive the report."

The platoon sergeants turn, face their platoons and receive the report from the squad leaders. The platoon sergeants then turn back to face the first sergeant. "Re..port," calls the first sergeant. And then, one-by-one the platoon sergeants report the whereabouts of their Soldiers.

  • One on leave
  • Three on pass
  • One TDY
  • Two on early work call
  • One at sick call
  • One out of ranks

Leaders are expected to know where their Soldiers are and what they are doing as the duty day begins. At the earliest opportunity, the unit tracks down anyone unexpectedly missing from formation.

I don't know why I've begun thinking about morning formation as I begin worship each Sunday. In addition to welcoming everyone and making the morning announcements, something inside of me wants to say, "Receive the report."

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Suicide Prevention Week 2008

Thursday, September 11th, 2008

It seems that our calendar is filled with observances for every possible cause and occasion. Some are noble; Sept. 15 is 'International Day of Democracy.' Some are silly; Sept. 19 is 'International Talk Like a Pirate Day.' In any event, there are so many of these occasions on the calendar that it is hard to give any of them serious attention. So, it is with great trepidation that I come to write something for 'Suicide Prevention Week,' September 7-13.

For those who have lived through a suicide of a family member or friend, every discussion of suicide is both serious and personal. It's not a joke, and it's not just another mandatory 'here's something good for you' lecture.

Let me share with you something that is ultimately personal. Some years ago, a member of my extended family killed himself. His wife had died after a painful struggle with cancer and he did not cope well with either her illness or her death. He had visible bouts of anger and depression. He used alcohol to numb the pain of his grief. He lost weight. He stopped caring about how he or his home appeared. He became withdrawn and isolated from family and friends. In the end, he shot himself with a handgun he kept at the house. Anyone who has attended a suicide prevention class could tell you the warning signs that are obvious in this story. In fact, they're probably pretty obvious without any training at all. I knew all of these things, and yet I was still surprised when I received the phone call telling me of his death.

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On Combat Stress and PTSD

Sunday, November 18th, 2007

Grim at BlackFive writes "On PTSD, or more properly, on Coming Home." His post is a response to Kat's commentary at veterans' mental health care at Castle Argghhh! Grim also references his previous post on "The Smell of Death." To me, the smells of combat were among the most vivid sensory experiences of the war. And Kat responds the Grim's essay by distinguishing between acute, short-term Post Traumatic Stress - which many people will experience to some degree - and the longer-term, chronic Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). All very well worth reading - especially if you are a combat vet still struggling with coming home.

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Helping Friends Cope with Trauma

Tuesday, June 27th, 2006

In my role as a chaplain, I sometimes work with individuals and families that have suffered some form of significant trauma, injury or disease. Some are war related; in my present job, however, most are not. Sometimes, friends or family members ask how they can best relate to people who have suffered great injuries. What follows is my inexpert opinion, based on my limited pastoral experience. I don't pretend to offer professional mental health advice. If what I suggest doesn't seem instinctively right to you, check with your own mental health advisor.

Twelve Strategies for Helping Friends with Long Term Coping and Recovery

1. Meet their needs, not yours. Be in tune with the person you are trying to help.

2. Maintain a sense of separation and distance, no matter how emotionally involved you may become. Maintain your own physical and mental health. Don't be a martyr or burn yourself out.

3. Physical and emotional reactions to disfigurement are normal. Deal with your reactions to their disfigurement somewhere else. If the person becomes aware of your physical reaction, tell them that this is a new experience for both of you. It's upsetting to see your friend hurting, but you'll both learn to deal with it. You want to be in the person's life and you hope what they saw didn't cause them too much additional pain.

4. Maintain hope even when the person can't. Maintain an expectation of recovery, improvement or renewed enjoyment of life - even if the circumstances don't improve or get worse. Perhaps things will never return to "normal." If not, help the person find a new "normal" in which the blessing of God's presence is real.

5. Be present as much but no more than the person wants. Everyone needs alone time and privacy as much as they need connection and communication.

6. Offer practical help, but don't smother the person. Encourage recovered independence in the long run.

7. Talk about the injury, trauma or disease as much as the person wants, but no more. Don't take the conversation somewhere the person doesn't want to go. Don't dig, and don't push the conversation past your level of intimacy. Silence is OK. Talking about things other than the accident, injury or disease is definitely OK. Allow the person to have and express whatever feelings come. All feelings can be "normal." There is no set of feelings or experiences that the person must have.

8. The injured person may attempt dark humor early in the healing process to express bitterness or despair. Allow it, but react to the pain, not the twisted humor. On the other hand, don't try to cover your own discomfort by making jokes yourself. If genuine laughter comes, it will probably come after a period of healing - and at the injured person's initiative.

9. Some discouragement, anger and feelings of hopelessness are normal. However, if your friend seems to be sinking into an ever deepening and constant state of depression, please encourage them to consult a mental health professional.

10. You'll make mistakes; that's the price of being involved with people. For the sake of the other person, forgive yourself and move on. Tell the other person that you are sorry that you did or said something hurtful, and then let it go. Don't impose your own continuing guilt feelings on them.

11. This is a new experience for you and for the person you are trying to help. Don't get stuck. If something isn't working, try something else until you find something that does work.

12. Trust God. Pray for your friend's recovery, and about items 1-11.